Picket Fences

The baby keeps splashing in the dogs' water bowl, and his pajamas are soaked up his right arm. I take him from the kitchen and place him in the living room, where he makes a beeline (seriously, who crawls that fast?) for the computer power strip where he innately knows the precise location of the on/off switch. Before I can move, he shuts down the computer on which I had just been working on an unsaved spreadsheet calculating our impossible bills. My stepson unknowingly tracks in dog poo on the bottom of his dad's much-too-large shoes that he had to wear - instead of his own, which fit perfectly, by the way - as he comes back inside from fetching a log from the woodpile for the fireplace. The dogs are at the front window barking at intruders that don't exist, and my husband comes into the kitchen looking for one of his innumerable magically disappearing tape measures, tracking in an obscene amount of sawdust that he has brought through all the hallways from the workshop. The pot on the Only-Two-Out-Of-Four-Burners-Work stove can now commence bubbling over.

This is where I have to stop and remind myself: this is what I've always wanted. No, seriously. You know, the thing about white picket fences is that you never see the splinters in the hands of those who built them. A baby whose greatest joy is making a mess of the dogs' water means I am finally a mother. I have the blessing and responsibility of raising and molding this amazing person that Heavenly Father has seen fit to send to me, even if we did have to wait on hold with the Heavenly Babies hotline longer than most people before we could place our order. A stepson who tracks in a mess for me to clean up is that same stepson who willingly, even eagerly, accepts chores because he honestly just wants to help. Barking dogs mean warm, soft, wagging bodies that still love you even at four in the afternoon and you still haven't gotten dressed or brushed your teeth. A husband who has almost single-handedly supported the tape measure industry means I have an eternal companion. That's right, a true best friend forever.

You see, when it comes down to it, what we perceive as our greatest burdens may in actuality be our greatest blessings. It all depends on the point of view to which you choose to subscribe. Over the past few years, I have challenged myself to a great personal exercise to try and maintain an eternal perspective. What does it matter if I have to put the fifth outfit in twenty-four hours on my little boy because he decided to dump all the water out of the dog bowl, again? It doesn't, because I got some really cute pictures; pictures to freeze a moment in time where his hands are still smaller than mine and his entertainment is free. For, as sore as slivers are, and as much as paint sticks to my skin, I am working on the prettiest fence I never could have imagined.

Adrienne is the stepmom of 10 year old Austin, the regular mom of 1 year old Porter, and the BFF of Lucas since 2005. She is from Virginia but is currently enjoying life in Provo, Utah. She loves writing, singing, playing video games and making others laugh.

Music Moment: He'll Carry You

As women, we all have times when it feels like we have been given more than we can bear. There are times when I have felt like I have been abandoned by my Heavenly Father only to realize that without him, I would not have been able to get out of bed this morning. I know that many of you are going through trials that you feel are too hard to bear. I want you to know that Heavenly Father HEARS your prayers and will not leave you alone. When I feel down, I like to listen to this amazing song by Hilary Weeks called "He'll Carry You". It makes me feel the spirit every time I hear it! I have also included the lyrics below. I would also like to dedicate this to the AMAZING Cathi Van Leuven and her family as she fights her battle with Cancer. They have always been an amazing example to me throughout my life.


He knows your heart
He knows your pain
He knows the strength it took just too simply breathe today
He sees the tears that you cry
He knows your soul is aching to know why
He hears your prayers each humble word
When you said you couldn’t face another day he understood
He knows the path that you will find
Though you felt alone he’s never left your side

He knew there’d be moments when no earthly words
Could take away your sorrow
And no human eyes could see what you’re going through
When you’ve taken your last step and done all that you can do
He will lift your heavy load and carry you

He’ll bring you peace and leave you hope
And in the darkest night he’ll comfort you
Until you know the sun will rise and each new day
You will have the strength to live again

And when there are moments when no earthly words
can take away your sorrow
And no human eyes could see what you’re going through
When you’ve taken your last step and done all that you can do
He will lift your heavy load and carry you

He hears you when you’re crying in the night
He hears you when your soul longs to find
Till the morning will come
And the light of the dawn reassures

That in the moments when no earthly words
can take away your sorrow
And no human eyes could see what you’re going through
When you’ve taken your last step and done all that you can do
He will lift your heavy load and carry you



Carli

Dealing with the Death of a Spouse

I wrote this poem as I struggled to deal with the passing of my husband. For a very long time I felt cheated, like I had been robbed of my fairytale. This was not part of the “plan” for me. I had two young children, and was suddenly all alone. As I leaned on my savior I found the courage and strength to carry on. When things were the hardest, I literally felt like I was being carried by my Savior and those in my family and ward who were praying for me. I know that by surrendering ourselves to Heavenly Father's will, he helps us become the women we need to be. He knows us. He loves us. He is real. He will carry us when we are too weak to take another step. Our lives make a difference.


If I could retrace my life, every moment that I’ve spent,
If I could feel again your love and all that it meant,
If I cold start from the end and work my way back through time,
If I could hold in peaceful stillness every moment you were mine
If I could cherish all the moments knowing they were our last,
If could have forgiven sooner, and let go of the past.
If I could have held you in our perfection just a moment longer,
If I could have been the woman you needed, someone wise and stronger,
Would our lives be different?
Would I still feel they were misspent?
Would I still look at our daughter and see you in her eyes?
Would I still hold our son and comfort his longfull cries?
Would I revisit the happy as well as the sad?
Would I still miss you this bad?
Would the lessons of yesterday still haunt my every dream?
Would I look back on all we suffered and know what it means?
In the refiners fire I feel the hurt and pain,
Through my saviors atonement I know you will live again.
He has felt my every sorrow and knows the painful ache
Upon his perfect shoulders, every burden he will take.
Knowing he is on my side gives me the courage to fight,
In the dawn of tomorrow comes the promise of the light,
With my savior I will overcome and chose greater light divine,
And the trace that my life has left will forever shine.



Teresa Malachowski Krolak

Creative Thinking

Just like many of you, our family was hit hard by the economy last year. My husband lost his job, and without any formal education, he was finding it difficult to find any employment. With much prayer and thought, we decided that it was best for him to go back to school. I had been a stay at home mom up until this point, but I knew that something needed to be done to help support my family during this time. I thought of getting a job, but I had a nursing baby and a two year old that I felt I could not leave yet. I had to start getting creative about what to do for money. I thought about talents that I had, and I made a list of things I thought could help me make an income for my family. My list looked something like this
1. Sewing
2. Crafts
3. Music
4. Teaching Children
I prayed about what I could do, and decided to try my hand at sewing. I started an online business for my handmade baby items, and tried to see if I could make any money. Although I was making a small income from this, I realized that it was nowhere near enough. I continued to pray, pleading with Heavenly Father to help me to know what to do. I thought about starting an in-home day care, but my house was just too small to accommodate many children. A few weeks later, I received a call from a friend in my ward. She told me that she was starting a day care out of her home and wanted me to be her partner. I knew that this was the answer to my prayer! I was able to be with my children and work to provide for them as well! Our day care is still going strong and it has proved to be a huge blessing in our life. I know that Heavenly Father heard and answered my prayers and helped me to know what to do.

Carli is a wife and a mother of two children ages 1 and 3. She loves to read, write and hang out with friends. She dislikes winter and just wants to be warm at all times! She is so excited to be involved in this blog and hopes that it helps many women.

He Answered My Plea for Help

After two nights of croup, my 3 year old was exhausted. Very late on the third night he could hardly catch his breath and I was an exhausted mess. I had tried steaming up the bathroom and bundling him up and taking him into the cold, winter night air, but nothing seemed to be helping. I was running out of options and energy. That was it, even though we didn’t have a penny to spare, we would have to take him into the ER. I couldn’t stand another moment watching my baby suffer. My husband bundled my helpless 3 year-old into his car seat and I left instructions for my brother in laws to listen for our sleeping 2 year old.
The ride to the hospital couldn’t be more than 7 or 8 minutes but it felt so much longer with my mind racing. How were we going to pay for this? Even with insurance, I knew it would cost us more than I wanted to think about. Were we doing the right thing? Was I overreacting?
As the gasping beside me slightly subsided I wondered if the fit has passed, and if I really was overreacting. But remembering the past few nights and the look of terror in his eyes as he couldn’t catch his breath made me eyes fill with tears. At the very least, I had to know what was wrong and make sure I was doing everything I possibly could for him.
We were almost to the ER and honestly, I didn’t feel good about it. But what else could we do? No Urgent Cares were open and I felt like I had exhausted all of our other resources. This was the most logical thing to do. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
By now his breathing was almost back to normal, but I knew it was only a matter of time until his coughing would overwhelm him again.
Venting my thoughts to my husband, he patiently listened to me asking questions here and there, but it became apparent he was letting me make the final decision.
I told him to head for home.
Again, my mind started racing and I began doubting myself all over again… I honestly didn’t know what to do.
“Pull over,” I told him. “We need to pray. I don’t know what to do.”
We did. It was a simple, pleading prayer to know the right thing to do for our son.
As soon as we finished, I had a peaceful feeling come over me with the words spoken to my mind, “He will be okay.”
I asked my husband what his impression was and he told me, “I think he will be okay.”
I was overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude to receive such a straight forward answer. I said a silent prayer of thanks, as we went home.
My son had little fits here and there, but that was the last night of croup. He was okay.
How grateful I am that Heavenly Father is there to help me raise my children! I know I cannot do it alone. How grateful I am that He knows all and understands so much more than I do! I am grateful for that experience because it solidified my testimony that Heavenly Father is there for me in all aspects, including parenting. It increased my own understanding of the love Heavenly Father has for each of us, and He will answer our prayers, even immediately, when we need him.

Alicia is a married, mother of two boys ages two and four years old and is expecting her third in May. She grew up on the island of Kaua’i where her parents still live after 22 years. She enjoys photography and meeting up with friends at the local Applebees for Strawberry Cheesecake Dessert Shooters.

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<----- That’s me. I’m Alicia. Hopefully you wont have to hear from me too often, but incase you do, I figured I should probably introduce myself and say hey… so, “Hey!”.

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